This Bi-Guy's Bi Sex Fantasy

If you have read this blog long enough, then you know I define my sexual orientation as being a predominately gay bisexual. And although that is the case, I have yet to have a sexual encounter that gives me all that I want sexually from a male and female simultaneously.

So what do I want exactly? What exactly is the bisexual 3-way that I lust for most?

For one, this would be a raw sex scenario.  One that might seem like a step back. For what I want would very likely stroke the hell out of the other bisexual male's ego. Because he would have 4 holes hungry and open to take in his cock: (1)my mouth, (2)the female's mouth, followed by (3)her pussy, then (4)my ass.

Foreplay

Me and her would take turns sucking his cock, then double team it. 

She takes one side, while I take the other. Or she works the bottom of his dick, while I work the top, or vice versa.

Here's a confession for you....When I watch straight porn, seeing a guy eat out a woman's pussy turns me on. With this being a chance to see it right before my eyes again, I would watch him go down on her. Making her moist and ready for his dick. And to make sure his dick is ready, I would stroke his dick and every reachable part of his body while watching him eat her out.

Sex
He would pound her pussy first. In as many positions he can do without cumming.

In missionary, I would once again be mostly a voyeur. 

Watching him and her fuck from the side, and from behind. I would become part of the action again when watching from behind, seeing his ass flexing from thrusting in and out of her, I would grope his ass and lick him from his taint to his ass crack.

In a position where her pussy becomes accessible to my mouth, that would be when I stop being voyeur, and become part of the action again. For in a position like doggy style, while he's pounding her (or she's throwing her pussy on him) I would lay underneath her, as to do a 69. Using my oral prowess to play with her clit. With my eyes wide open looking at his cock slide back and forth in her pussy, and seeing his balls swell from the pleasure. And the sight of those balls swelling is going to make me hunger to lick them at least a little bit. Stopping the moment I feel (or he says) it will make him cum. Because him cumming from this would ruin my main goal....

All of this should make his cock get wetter and wetter. So the moment I realize that the combination of him fucking her pussy and me licking her clit has made her pussy super moist, I'd prepare for my turn of his dick being in my hole, and unloading from all the joy it has endured.

For my aforementioned main goal of this 3-way is to take in a hot guy's dick that's wet and shiny from a sexy girl's pussy juice. Putting it in my lubed up hole, and him thrusting and throbbing in my ass in as many positions as possible until his body can't contain it anymore, and he shoots his cum load all up in my ass.

With so much action, I'm sure he would build up quite a lot of jizz. And with my tight hole, it might be a good number of hours before it finally looks to get out of my ass....And that's how I would like it.

I have no desire to imitate these porn videos where the girl or guy pushes out the cumload. I want all of that DNA from my playmates lingering inside me for a good while after we've orgasmed. Be those orgasms physical, or mental, like mine when I bottom.

All of this is what I mainly see in my dream bisexual 3-way. Anything extra you might be thinking I should do, or should happen to me isn't a rejected notion. It's simply not in the top of my list of planned actions. Therefore, they would be a bonus to aforementioned 3-way plans.

Now, when and if this happens, I will definitely let you know. Because that would be sex so good that I would not be able to keep its splendor a secret.

The Unionization Seed

On June 29, 2017, the workers of The Pleasure Chest's NYC locations voted unanimously for union representation by the Retail, Wholesale, and Department Store Union (RWDSU). The above poem was written before the vote and uploaded to my Facebook, Vimeo, and YouTube accounts to show why I was one of those unanimous votes. My reasons for voting are also expressed in interviews I did for Gay City News and Into.

We are presently in union contract negotiations, and some key matters to us workers were constantly disregarded. So it led to the tale told in this video that is on my Facebook and Twitter accounts:



These events transpired because we were treated as if we are powerless when we are not. Before this, earlier in the week, something else happened that is summed up by this Facebook post of mine that I'll close with....

https://www.facebook.com/LeNairXavier/posts/1850986481595479

No Longer Mr. Handsome NYC

Back in June, I won the title of Mr. Handsome NYC.

Part of my requirements as winner is to throw a fundraiser. I was all for this. In fact, I started contacting possible sponsors like immediately after winning. However, my selection and what was promised by those possible sponsors was looked upon as bare-boned. My search for sponsors was so brief because I was unaware of how much went into doing such a fundraiser, since I had never done such a thing. Plus in this case, I was unaware that the money for the benefiting organization did not come from a portion of admission. So with my writing 3 blogs, doing appearances, and as a union brother reminded me when I posted about this matter on Facebook, 1 or 2 union bargaining sessions each month since my day job unionized, there is no time for me to take on such an undertaking.

I offered the host, Hunteur that instead of doing a fundraiser, to simply host one night of the Handsome NYC party where I could choose a theme, decent porn, and music to set the mood. I believe since I had never done a fundraiser before, hosting a party night would me a much more reasonable dip of my toe in the water or organizing an event than adding fundraising to those duties.

Well, my offer to simply host a party was denied. So I was instead asked for the return on my crown, which is fine by me.

 For being the perfectionist that I am, I saw the crash-course offered of how to make a fundraiser being against my work ethic. I need to have the time to give my all. I was given a full year of my reign to make that fundraiser happen, but with all that I am presently doing, it would have still been a rush job to do an entire fundraiser.

Furthermore, I can't work with my position in gay nightlife being misconstrued as it was. For it was believed that I was greatly involved in gay nightlife. This is a great misconception that could have been avoided by paying close attention to my writing, and what kind of notoriety and lack of notoriety it results in.

For anyone who really takes note of what I write would realize what I write about gay nightlife is from the position of being an observer. Not by any means do my writings show me to be "connected" on such a friendly level with anyone in gay nightlife to be considered "involved". If I was, then how come after all of these years of blogging about gay nightlife have I never received a Glam Award nomination? Exactly. So entertaining that misconception was an added pressure I won't allow. Nor am I under any obligation to prove or disprove it.

Looking back on this, I realize now that part of the reason for the lack of contestants which allowed me to win that contest by default might be because of another reason besides the pretentiousness in gay NYC now. I feel the lack of contestants might be because possible contestants know someone who has done fundraising already. Thereby giving the potential contestant knowledge that I didn't have. They already knew about the barrage of emailing and back and forth that must be done for a fundraiser where the money to the beneficiary does not come from the admission. Either that, or they don't have the online following to feel confident in doing as much as host a party like I had offered. So they bowed out of the idea of competing. With that said, I believe that if the responsibilities after winning are scaled down some, then contestants who sign up (then actually show up) might not be so hard to come by.

In any case, I hope the best of luck to my alternate. I'll get the crown back to Hunteur when I'm out and about at that time. As for those who showed me such support before, during, and after winning the contest, I give to you a WHOLEHEARTED THANK YOU. 💋

Sex Toy Review - SackJack

One of the first things look for in a masturbation sleeve is whether or not a male's penis can go from flaccid to erect in it. For one the main pleasures of penile masturbation for a male should be that it lessens the pressure on him to be erect. Therefore, a masturbation sleeve should do the same thing. So if the material the masturbation sleeve is made out of is too hard to allow me to see early on the ability for a male to grow in it, then I quickly lose interest in anything else it has to offer, like texture. Luckily, that is not the case with the SackJack by Oxballs.

It's made a soft TPR that lets you start out flaccid, and grow to a full erection while inside it.

For that growth to happen, you need the proper lubrication for your cock's friction with the toy. My day job recommends a water-based lube. However, the packaging of the SackJack also recommends silicone lube as a possible lube choice, which I have to agree with since it makes a slicker glide. These lube suggestions are for the shaft part of the toy, not the part for your balls. If you feel the need to use lube for the part to place your balls, use a water-based lube, because silicone can get too slippery and make your balls slip out while stroking the shaft. Oil-based lubes are not recommended at all.

The SackJack is not as cumbersome as the popular Fleshlight/Fleshjack or my beloved Tenga Flip Hole. It just feels like you put on a textured second skin of your dick and balls with the texturing being for your pleasure, and no one else's. While the balls of the toy don't have texture, they do have a small hole in each ball. These can be used for drainage in watersports play, passageways for currents in electro-play, or the most simple that I've used them for, suction to your ball sack.

For awhile, many have commented on my Nude Dude Review videos that they would like to see a video of me actually using the toy that I've stripped down for. Well, your wish is finally granted. For the video below is not a Nude Dude Review video. It's an X-rated video of me playing with the SackJack. Displaying all of the aforementioned points. Such as my cock going from flaccid to erect while in the toy, using silicone lube for lubrication, and squeezing the balls for suction.

So is it a spoiler alert that the dick-slapping gif is from the end of the video? ENJOY.

Jerking Off With My SackJack powered by XTube

Mike Pence's homophobia is nothing new. via @actdottv pic.twitter.com/I93fGLM0RH

— George Takei (@GeorgeTakei) October 26, 2017

The Bottoming Ass-Man's Missionary

I have always said that I'm an ass-man whether I top or bottom. It's the reason why when I top, to please myself, I prefer doggy-style. The switching up is for my sex partner. However, being an ass-man even when I bottom, I prefer missionary. And it's for more lustful reasons than the obvious intimacy from that position.

In fact, I'm such an ass-man even when I bottom that I have had (and still do have) many a sexual fantasy about bottoming for a hot guy just by seeing only his ass, and not his cock. And sometimes, it's without even seeing his face.

For my goal then is to make the sex be about an exchange. I give my ass in exchange for him letting me grope his butt repeatedly. So from my love of the beauty of the male booty even while bottoming came this erotic poem:

Reunion/Redemption Sex In The Men's Den

About 2 years ago, I wrote a post for my LXtreme Tumblr titled "Swiss Navy, Change Is Not Always Good". It was a tale about a sex party in which I experimented with Swiss Navy's Premium Anal lube with a playmate I've had the pleasure of having inside me before. The lube however, has clove flower extract, which is a natural ingredient, but causes numbing. This in turn led to me being denied me feeling the pleasure that time around. Not to mention that numbing turns off your body's natural alarm to tell you and your partner if you're overdoing it. Luckily, my playmate was skilled enough to not put me in that situation.

I had a number of guys tell me they were glad I wrote the post. Whoever handles Swiss Navy's Twitter account obviously felt differently. For one random day, I decided to go to their Twitter page...

All to discover that I was BLOCKED.

Oh well, they're not the best lube anyway. So there was no need to be devastated. What was devastating me was my not being able to redeem myself to my playmate from that encounter. For we saw each other at a couple of parties since that one. However, I was not prepared to bottom. So for 2 years thus far, since I strive to give the best of myself even in my casual sex encounters, in the back of my mind was a desire to have some reunion sex with him to redeem myself. I owed him for my pretending it was great sex. Especially when the fact that it wasn't great that time was not his fault in any way, shape, or form.

I recently went to a party called "Men's Den". It was only my 2nd time going. The 1st time I went, I was a bit of a wallflower. This time, I was sure me being a wallflower would not be the case. I just didn't know how soon after my arrival.

As soon as I walked in, I noticed a white guy who looked familiar, but before I could get settled in the room and investigate it, an older white guy approached me. I felt some sexual attraction to him, but his aggression of not letting me get settled in made the attraction short-lived. So I politely moved his hand, and stood on the side to settle in. Once I felt more settled, the guy I noticed as soon as I walked in came near me. His immediate look at me told me why he looked familiar. It was because he resembled my playmate from "Swiss Navy, Change Is Not Always Good". Then "resembled" turned to certainty once we greeted each other with "Hello".

We stroked each other's cock immediately after that "Hello", and started making out. So the sexual spark between us was definitely still there. But I didn't want to get my hopes up that night was going to be the night I could redeem myself.

At one point during our making out, I had my back to him, and he played with my nipples and cock. There was a dark-skinned black guy with this beautiful ass standing at a diagonal from me watching all of this. Me and my playmate both saw him, and moved closer to him. I laid down on my stomach on the edge of the bed with my playmate on top of me. The black guy's rock hard cock was right in my face, and I started sucking on him because he was a hottie on my To-Fuck list. Because that guy had an ass I couldn't decide if I wanted to put my cock in it, or grope it in missionary while he stuffed me with his big, tasty dick.

If my personal mission wasn't to redeem myself to my reunion playmate, I would have gladly made what was starting as a 1-on-1 into a 3-way. However, I'm not your typical gay male, jumping from one guy to another, even before I've even finished what I started with the one I'm already with. In short, even as a sex party tryst, I'm loyal. So since I was already in the midst of playing with my reunion playmate, I reluctantly stopped sucking on the black guy's cock and proceeded with my reunion playmate. As we continued, he grabbed a condom. That made me realize that my wish for the night was coming true. He was going to top me.

We got more on the bed. He laid me down on my back. I raised my legs, relaxing my hole to take him inside me. My hole twitched watching him put the condom on his hard dick, because it meant I was that much closer to having my ass filled with it, then his thrusts. So when the head of his dick touched the edge on my hole, it sent a tingle on my hole. A tingle that started spreading all over my body the more his cock went inside me.

While I could still hear chit-chat in the room, his tall frame hovering over me made me forget all about them, while also blocking my view of them. He was all I could focus on. Correction, he was all I wanted to focus on.

We later changed positions to where he was on his back, and I was riding his cock. Next to us was a cute light Latino getting his dick sucked. He looked at me, and tried to kiss me. Since I knew my reunion playmate didn't mind me playing with others in some capacity while with him, I let the guy kiss me. We both liked how the other kissed, and we kept going back for more. Our kissing got to be so much that I didn't want to part with it. Nor did I want to stop riding my reunion playmate's cock. So I had to re-position myself to do both comfortably.

I turned myself to ride my reunion playmate's dick at about a 45 degree angle, and stretched my left leg out. I moved my right leg in between my top's thighs, put myself back in the squatting position, and rode my top's cock while kissing the hottie still getting sucked. Yes, I showed myself to be quite flexible for 46 years of age.

I don't need to go any further with how the action went. For my goal was accomplished. He laid his pipe inside me, and because that Swiss Navy lube wasn't part of the picture, I felt every sweet sensation from his every thrust of, and every ride on his dick.

After my playing with my reunion playmate, we cuddled. During that cuddle, I admitted my being glad to have run into him. How I felt I needed to redeem myself, and telling him why I needed to redeem myself. So yes, I told him about the Swiss Navy Premium Anal lube numbing me to feel the pleasure his cock gives my hole. And due to his great sense of humor, he laughed about it. Especially since it gave me more reason to give him my ass.

Some of you are probably thinking, "He was just a fuck, not your boyfriend. So why all of the concern of wanting to 'redeem' yourself, or 'do right by him'?"

It's because, even if he's a tryst at a sex party, or a bar backroom, he is still a human being. And his actions towards me more so proved that.

For he never treated me like he wanted me just because I was Black. He never talked about me "loving his white dick", or him "loving my black booty". I simply had an ass he wanted to fuck, and at times, a dick he wanted to take in. No mention of color required. And when he topped me, it was with passion. Not aggression to emulate a modern-day rendition of a white man raping his black slave. Nor did he ask for aggression from me topping him where I was the black male using hole-tearing sex on him to avenge the abuse my forefathers suffered from slavery. That was not us. Even more deserving of a reward since all of our previous trysts were at a party that fetishizes black males in its marketing. Very contrary to this party whose marketing puts everyone of every color and ethnicity on the same level. So with the aforementioned negative actions having no place with us, if I screw up a fuck, he (and any man like him) deserves my desire to redeem myself. Making it my duty to give my booty when that opportunity for redemption presents itself.

And here was that opportunity, and I'm so glad that I honored it.

Roots Of My Stance On Poppers

Every stance we take has a root much like any plant, flower, or tree. So while I have been very harsh in my stance against poppers, I figured I should explain what the roots of my hard stance against poppers are exactly. So maybe, you'll understand, instead of thinking I'm just being judgmental about poppers for no reason. and if you're using them, you just might find my roots good reason to reconsider taking another huff.

Whatever choice you make, the choice is yours.

And as to why I'm so scantily clad while explaining all of this to you, for that you have to watch the video....

A FeelMe Weekend

In a post for Kiiroo, I wrote about why I believe there are so few gay interactive/virtual reality porn sites. The 2 main reasons I stated was because 1) the producers of such porn are targeting the wrong part of the gay male population. They are targeting tops when they should be targeting bottoms more, which is difficult to do when; 2) there are really no toys (as far as I knew at the time) that were anal-safe at the time of purchase. Well, I have just been proven wrong on this.

After all of this time writing for Kiiroo, I never fully explored their FeelMe.com website. In light of the aforementioned post for Kiiroo, I did. Nothing changed about my reasoning as to why there are so few gay VR sites. It did however change the number of videos I have access to for my straight porn consumption. It also increased the number of toys I can use for that straight porn viewing.

Some time back, via Twitter, I saw Kiiroo post about them joining with We-Vibe on a project. The most info I could get at the time was that the possibility of them incorporating the technology to make the Kiiroo Pearl into a We-Vibe Nova, which I listed as a sex toy marketed for females but can be used my males in a post for Thotyssey. I thought that news meant a new toy was on the way. Which would be great because as I said in my Nude Dude Review of the We-Vibe Nova, with its clitoral stimulator acting as the base every anal toy needs, I originally reviewed it for The Pleasure Chest website as a prostate massager.

Well, it turns out that a incorporating that technology into a We-Vibe Nova leading to a new toy was only somewhat true. In actuality, the We-Vibe Nova (as well as all of the other We-Vibe toys meant for some internal use) have more features because they are able to be used with many (if not all) of the websites listed on FeelMe.com.

If you follow or have friended me on Facebook, your might recall this post:

For this reason, and my recent discovery of FeelMe.com, I was beating off like a fiend to their straight porn selection that weekend that featured these 3 studs:

I've had a thing for Nick Jacobs ever since I first saw his body and that thick dick in a StraightGuysForGayEyes video some years ago. So I couldn't resist watching a video featuring him on the Playgirl channel.

I also went back to Pornhub to check a video I had seen there before that worked with my Kiiroo Onyx. It featured another straight porn actor I'm in lust with, Mr. Pete. I can't resist that still gorgeous face, still slim body, uncut dick, nice butt, and his lust for women of many colors. I was pleased to discover that the We-Vibe Nova worked with that site as well. The only drawback (if you can call it that) was me feeling vibrations in my ass from the We-Vibe Nova when Mr. Pete's dick was getting stroked or sucked on because as I stated in the aforementioned Kiiroo post, most interactive videos are made for use with the penetrating male in mind. Therefore, such videos are programmed with the intent of being in sync with a sex toy like a Kiiroo Onyx.

Such is not the case when I went back to FeelMe.com and paid for a subscription to FeelPorna. The video I tried there was made definitely programmed for use with a Kiiroo Pearl, or any We-Vibe toy.

It featured Emilio Ardana in a straight porn video, which is what he's known for. However, to some of you, he might look more familiar than the other aforementioned males from straight porn because Emilio has done gay porn. I don't know if there are other sites he's worked for, but he has definitely a few scenes for MenAtPlay under the name "Caleb Roca".

As I watched the video in sync with the We-Vibe Nova, because of the vibration going through the part meant for clitoral stimulation as well as the shaft, any playing he did with Susy Gala's pussy, I felt. Even his eating her out and flicking her clit with his tongue. So with a We-Vibe Nova, Emilio licking her clit sent a vibration to my taint that went all the way to my prostate.

If I knew that I was going to have this much new-found fun with my We-Vibe Nova, I might have recorded it. Then again, it probably would have wound up being like my hook-ups with a fuck-buddy of mine. I keep telling myself to record us together, but I get so into putting my cock in his ass that I forget all about the existence of my phone to record us. In these cases, I got so into the sensation of the We-Vibe Nova in my ass and being in sync with the porn that recording the bliss would have taken too much time of my attention.

With this pleasuring weekend, I had to work on Sunday, but felt great going to work. Then when I got home, I played some more, so I was right as rain by Monday. So much so that I was more motivated than ever to produce the Nude Dude Review of the We-Vibe Nova. So yes, besides a number of orgasms and sprays of my jizz, something you can actually see resulted from that fun FeelMe Weekend.

Nude Dude Review - We-Vibe Nova

I know it's been months since my last Nude Dude Review. Well, I hope this delay gives you a review of the We-Vibe Nova that won't disappoint your ears, your body,....or your eyes. ;-)

Are You A Stereotype of Color/Ethnicity?

If what I have written has you angry, then as much as you might claim to be angry at me, the reality is... you are mad at yourself. You are mad at yourself for being a stereotype. Well, here's a reality check for you to cash. I'm not your parents who raised you. Nor am I the gay who led you to be a stereotype. So if this revelation hit you hard to the point of making you want to write an angry comment, see me to curse me out, slap, or punch me in the face, then do it to your mirror. Because you're supposed to be an adult. So if you're following any of those credo, you need to blame yourself.

Anal-yzing The Anal Needs For Anal Pleasure

ANAL SEX! 

Say that phrase to someone like me, and their sphincter twitches anticipating the pleasure of a desired person entering them, or they get a raging hard-on from the thought of being the one doing the entering. For others however, their sphincter twitches ...but not out of anticipating pleasure. Instead, it's in anticipation of 2 P words.

Those 2 P words being,… POOP and PAIN.

Many fear anal sex because they still feel the anus is the "exit only" zone we were initially taught by our parents. Undoing this lesson after at least a decade and a half of one's upbringing is a tough task. But one I hope can be sparked by this article. 

SHIT HAPPENS 

Because we have been long taught the anus is only to be an exit for the body's solid excrement, many fear the thought of it being used as another passageway to pleasure. OR they have experienced it on their own, but now feel guilty for it. 

The fear of poop can be greatly lessened by the combination of a good anal douching when anal sex is anticipated, and a diet that leads to regular bowel movements. Therefore, I highly recommend that one lessens their intake of processed food. 

This is not to say that an accident will never happen. It can. And if it does, assess the situation. If it's not beyond quick repair, don't quit. Instead, simply accept it as the natural possibility that it is, do a quick clean-up, and get back to work on making those orgasms happen. However, if you follow my advice to lessen your chances of an accident, you can go into anal sex with a lot more confidence that uninterrupted pleasure will be the outcome. At least on your end (no pun intended). 

HAVEN'T GOT TIME FOR THE PAIN 

What many don't realize is that the 3 biggest combatants to the idea of pain during anal sex are PATIENCE, LUBE, and DESIRE. 

PATIENCE is what a lot of tops are lacking in. If you're a bottom who uses poppers and think back to how you were introduced to poppers, your memory would most likely fall on either a top pushing them on you during sex. Or a bottoming friend who if they traced their introduction to poppers would bring them to the memory of the same brand of aforementioned top. Either way, like many things in the sex industry, poppers are a means to lessen the responsibility of the penetrating male at the expensive of their partner to be penetrated. 

As much as I would like to slide my cock into my bottom the second I become erect, I practice patience with my bottom. For his body might not be ready to receive my cock the second my body is ready to give it. And I don't want him to slowly (but surely) kill his brain cells huffing on poppers just to make me happy. With that said, bottoms must also practice patience with themselves. 

I know many take offense to my position on poppers. Well, before you go there, take note: 

Who better to advise you on being anti-poppers than a man who is versatile in gay sex, was a total bottom for at least 2 years before becoming totally versatile, hated poppers then, and has since been practically gangbanged without poppers, and in one night almost fisted, but totally tag-teamed, and double-penetrated without the use of poppers.

 Thereby justifying my anti-poppers stance. 

What helped me to succeed such anal feats are the 2 other things not properly executed by many. 

LUBE of course is needed to lessen the friction of penetration. And a good quality lube can make that friction go from harsh to sweet in an instant. Harsh to sweet in a way that's both mentally and physically healthy for both parties. 

This is a must for the anus. Due to the fact that the anus is not self-lubricating like a vagina. No matter how excited one gets from their sex partner(s). 

In lube recommendations, I personally am a big fan of Pjur BackDoor. The silicone-based formula has jojoba oil, which relaxes the sphincter muscles. Thereby lessens the supposed need for poppers by bottoms. It effects are not instantaneous, so give it a minute before expecting to feel a difference.

However, if you find yourself any degree allergic, then I suggest Sliquid Silk or Ride Bodyworx Silk Hybrid. 

They are the same exact formula made by the same company, but with gender-directed labeling. 

Despite my complimenting their regular lube, I believe that Swiss Navy blocked me from their Twitter page because of me advising the following in a Tumblr post: 

A definite DO NOT in lubes is any lube claiming to be primarily for the anus having clove oil extract as an ingredient. Clove oil extract may be a natural ingredient, but it induces numbing. Therefore, turning off your body's natural alert system when you're doing too much - pain. So shutting off that natural alert system can result in temporary or irreparable damage. Thereby showing itself to be another product in the sex industry catering and enabling laziness in the penetrating male. Or penetrating female when you talk about pegging. 

Along with patience of both parties and proper lube, in order to have great anal sex, there's a word that the word-perv in me gets quickly aroused by.... 

DESIRE. If you truly desire taking in the person anally, it will make you a lot easier to be entered into. For your brain is your main sex organ. Letting desire be part of putting your mind at ease helps a great deal. And this put the one doing the penetration at ease of hurting you. For if they're a quality penetrator, they will have the concern and patience to accommodate you. 

With that said, don't try anal sex solely because your partner wants to. Make it be because you want to. After all, it's your body, your call. 

Now, back to poppers for a moment. Some of you are probably still thinking that even with desire you need poppers. Please stop lying to yourself.

I see many guys who use poppers, try to claim poppers to not be a drug, YET when those poppers fall or end up suddenly missing, they scramble across that bed, floor, or wherever the poppers might be. Looking like the common drug addict when they drop or lose their paraphernalia. You can't fully claim desire as part of your anal play if this is how you act.

For if you act like you can't fuck without poppers, then you are dependent upon poppers. Desire is not part of your sex equation. For one's desire should be 100% dependent on the person you're having sex with. Not someone else, or something else. 

  

To get to this point of overcoming those road blocks to great anal sex, one needs to relax. Feel empowered that you are letting this person enter you because you said they can. They may have suggested it to you, but in the end, since it's your body, you had the final say. Let knowledge of that empower you, and you will find your body doing many pleasurable things you didn't think were possible. And when that happens, you will find many fears on many things (not just anal sex) put at ease.